“All will die eventually, but how many had lived?” is a phrase from Braveheart, rather than running away for the fear of losing our life (or something), isn’t it more meaningful to risk it and fight for something important, something life changing.
I know what death is all about, is where everything end (whether there is an afterlife is totally another matter). At least it is the end for the journey here on earth. Had I lived? Besides breathing and walking around, I at times do think had I really lived? How could I have lived? Is it about accomplishment of dreams? Is it about how much had I help others? Is it about how much good had I done? Is it about how satisfied I am? Some say life is a long journey of learning; some say it is another cycle to repay our debt; some say it’s to believe in God; some say it’s just a matter of breathing; some say it’s to fulfill a destiny. Another interesting thoughts: the learning and purpose of life lies within the journey, not the destination. So it isn’t really about what we had accomplished or what we try to accomplish, but how we did it?
Does it matter if I am a lawyer, a hawker, a businessman or a programmer? Where does my passion lies? Is it the choice of a profession, or how I carry out my profession, or how I carry my life? I like being a programmer, does it means that I will be a happy programmer? Would I be happier if I were to be a chef? Or it is all about how we are trying to be the things we choose to be.
How do we live? Trying to be what we choose to be, and be happy with it (since it’s our choice after all). What makes us unhappy? Doing the things we don’t like. Why would we do such thing? To make a living, sacrifices for bigger happiness in the end, or we can’t think of something better to do. Many idea and learning which I already know, but I keep on forgetting or unaware of how to apply them in time and properly.
I guess I had always set out a course, but I divert from my course at times, I stop at times, I got distracted at times, and I got on the wrong course, or I decide to change my course totally. Life is like one gigantic project, we need to have milestones and do a review from times to times. The essence of the project may not lies within the end, but how we actually do it in between.
Seek the light, as I always try to do. What is the real path, as I always ask myself. How should I live, as I always try to figure out. Rather than pondering on the mystery of life, I should really learn to go through life each day, ending it with satisfaction and much anticipation for the next to come by. Forget about whining, forget about fear, forget about escaping, and forget about uncertainty. It is all about what I should do now, at this moment, to make a better day for myself, and an even better tomorrow.
I ask myself, will this work? Am I picking a right path? I guess the answer to both the question shall be yes if I can put my heart out to make it work, rather than wondering about it.
One think is for sure, we can't never know for sure, we can only believe in it. Still more soul searching to come? I really don't know :| I think I have been thinking too much and doing too little, that's for sure.