I guess once in a while, I would felt some fear, some uncertainty, some reluctant which immobilize me. Perhaps it’s part of the confusion of what to do with my life, or how am I going to go through it. Too bad there isn’t a quick fix or answer, as I have to gather strength, stand up and continue my journey again.
Sometimes it is really not easy to gather consistent strength. Though I have no idea where I would reach at this moment, but I think it is important for me to keep moving no matter what, at least for the moment. Perhaps I was hoping one day that the clouds would clear and I could see what is installed for me.
Sometimes I look at people around me; I will kinda sadden with their lifestyle. A middle age man drinking coffee alone with a worrisome face and working cloth, an old man drive his trucks around the neighborhood trying to sell some buns, or a 30-ish women going from table to table trying to sell some biscuits. Somehow I felt sadden that their life have to be such, working so hard just to survive, yet the future is insecure.
Am I being too complacent or lazy, or afraid of hardship? Am I worry for my future, or am I asking too much of a lifestyle. I guess I know what I want for the moment and trying to give a chase for it (before I no longer have the energy and determination or luxury to go for it). Sometimes I do forget that I am 27, thinking I was way older. But 27 are neither too young, as time passed by really quickly.
Again, for a better tomorrow :)